Bear Jew Facts

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Should you ever find yourself plagued by hiccups, all you need to do is imagine the Bear Jew is after you. You will be so terrified, you’ll never get the hiccups again. Of course, you’ll also have nightmares that the Bear Jew is going to bash your head in with his bat.

via ToRestOrRange

Filed under The Bear Jew Facts submission

1,122 notes

whytheyrehot: Why He’s Hot: That’s Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname: The Bear Jew. That alone should get your loins tingling. Fuck a duck! Look at those muscles. All of his Nazi killing has clearly kept him in top physical condition. His eyes. Those big, dark balls of hotness let you know that he has killed before, but also that there may be a tender side deep within him. I for one would be willing to explore that further given the chance. He looks ridiculously good in a suit. Check him out. He is also the only person in the known universe who can wear pants this high and come out of it looking hot as all hell. He doesn’t just beat German soldiers with a club. Bashes their brains in with a baseball bat is what he does. I’d be willing to step up to the plate anytime he wanted to swing his ”bat” in my direction, that’s for sure. {submission}

whytheyrehot:

Why He’s Hot:

  1. That’s Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname: The Bear Jew. That alone should get your loins tingling.
  2. Fuck a duck! Look at those muscles. All of his Nazi killing has clearly kept him in top physical condition.
  3. His eyes. Those big, dark balls of hotness let you know that he has killed before, but also that there may be a tender side deep within him. I for one would be willing to explore that further given the chance.
  4. He looks ridiculously good in a suit. Check him out. He is also the only person in the known universe who can wear pants this high and come out of it looking hot as all hell.
  5. He doesn’t just beat German soldiers with a club. Bashes their brains in with a baseball bat is what he does. I’d be willing to step up to the plate anytime he wanted to swing his ”bat” in my direction, that’s for sure.

{submission}

Filed under The Bear Jew eli roth

17 notes

Anonymous asked: Which does the bear jew prefer? Staring at people or actually having sex?

Why have a prefence when he can enjoy doing both at the same time?

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Anonymous asked: I am a blonde hair blue eyed german.....but i am also jewish. should i be afraid?

Nope. Typically, the blonde hair, blue eyed, German Nazi’s are the ones who need to be afraid.

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Anonymous asked: Does the Bear Jew like waffles?

More of a pancakes kind of gentleman.

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neverfadexxx-deactivated2010122 asked: how many jews could a bearjew jew if a bearjew could jew jews?

As many as he wants in bed.

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Anonymous asked: Does the Bear Jew like the Beatles?

Of course. It would be a crime not to.

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Anonymous asked: Does the Bear Jew have unlimited texting?

He doesn’t need to text, he’ll beat the hell out of you if he wants to send someone a message.

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Anonymous asked: I don't have a bat to protect myself, How do I call on the Bear Jew for help?

He isn’t like the Ghostbsuters, can’t just call him up. He comes when he is needed.

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Anonymous asked: Would the bear jew ever have sex with a minor? Cause im only 15.

Negative Skywalker.

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lizlemonextract asked: According to security system commercials, I am an easy target for predators because I am female. I just bought a baseball bat for my protection, and I have never felt this safe in my life. Thanks, Bear Jew!

Your welcome and for more tips, just come on by.

Tip #1: Get yourself a lighter and some gasoline - if someone messes with you, start up a fire, stick the end of the bat in it and start beating the hell out them. It might be fun!